Speldhurst Cricket Club

6th August v Farningham (A)

CONCEDED

12th August v Four Elms

Our return fixture against Four Elms started inauspiciously. A quick lunchtime shower meant Amir and Omar had to bowl with a greasy bar of soap for the first few overs. That and a 30mph crosswind. This made everything rather tricky for us for a while, and 30 runs slipped through our fingers worryingly quickly.

But then momentum shifted pronto. After a couple of errant overs, Amir served up a juicy full toss that was thumped straight at my face and only self-preservation meant I caught it. After he’d finally trudged off, Amir bowled their number three, to his dismay, first ball. Keeper White says the ball nipped back at least two feet, Amir described it as “disgusting” but their batsman had much stronger words for it.

From then on it was easier work. Omar sorted out his run-up to bowl six good overs wicketless, I brought myself on for two ‘ease-myself-back-in’ overs but had so much fun I bowled nine, and M Flem continues to defy his own calls for retirement and (eventually) took a well-deserved 5fer. Even bowled someone round his legs! Bit of a show-off in front of his future son-in-law, but we’ll forgive him.

Highlights were the future-son-in-law’s excellent keeping display, despite moaning he’s not a keeper. A sharp stumping and a diving catch (not in the same ball) showed class and meant we were virtually flawless in the field. Ground fielding from Freddie, Oak, Fowler and everyone was without reproach and kept pressure well on.

Momentum shifted slightly towards the end of the innings as Milo had us frustrated (with his batting) and racked up a 30-run final wicket partnership, including thwacking a wayward Flem delivery to the boundary to the jubilation of anyone Four Elms-inclined. That and Fowler pulling up injured… fingers and toes crossed all is fine! 138ao, wholly chasable.

Oak and M Flem started sedately, with more than their fair share of swishes that only served to frustrate Four Elms further. M Flem departed first for not many, but future-son-in-law came in and hit the ball HARD. Things were looking good.

Enter Milo: our nemesis. His wilybowling ended up bamboozling four ‘Hurstians (again). Oak, after compiling a very good 38, was bowled trying to hit it to Sevenoaks; FSIL holed out on the boundary despite telling me he wouldn’t; Freddie tried to hit the ball to the moon a lot (and didn’t, but had a good time trying); and Tristan was caught well at short cover. A one-legged Fowler, complete with a confused runner disguised as Freddie, was also thwarted by a combination of Crowhursts.

After being 80-1 at drinks in firm control, we caught up with the Four Elms total with over 10 overs left, but six wickets down. Luckily I remained impervious to Milo’s mystery, and Yaz the Finisher eventually had to come and show everyone how to do it, biffing a boundary expertly through first slip, and then dismissively slapping their captain over mid-wicket. Nerveless.

Comfy in the end, and now just 30ish points from absolute safety as we visit bottom-of-the-league Flimwell for the second time this season. Superb from everyone – onwards!

Scorecard: https://speldhurst.play-cricket.com/website/results/5548007

19th August v Flimwell (A)

And so we rocked up in dribs and drabs to Flimwell for the second time this season, after sitting in hot traffic outside Bedgebury for the second time this season. Today we could put to bed any slim mathematical possibility of relegation, and do the double over doomed Flimwell.

Omar opened the bowling with a buttery smooth new run-up, and what resulted was a very tight spell of seven overs (0-14) that set the tone perfectly for the rest of the innings. Siraj (2-16) also went at only two an over and picked up good wickets to make it his most successful season for Speldhurst. But with such a tight opening spell from both (just 12 runs from the first 10 overs!), we were bracing for a counterattack.

Luckily, when it came we had plenty of firepower to deal with it. Amir (1-19) replaced Omar and bowled full and patiently, whilst M Flem (2-46) took significantly fewer balls to work out the slope than last time and lured another two victims to his growing pile. Just when their number three looked set to accelerate, enter G Fitz. In a blistering three-over spell he bowled faster the more injured he made himself. He took two wickets, including an excellent caught and bowled, and knocked the wind out of Flimwell’s sails. Two more three-over spells from J Flem and Ejas rewarded the latter with a wicket, but a medium wag allowed them to reach 125-9. A little dozy from the Hurst in the last five overs (a little like last week) but the damage was done early.

As a significant portion of our 10-man team jumped in a people carrier to seek a teatime supermarket sandwich, M Flem and J Flem were preparing for their final innings playing together. Stories were swapped about good bowling, retirement games, and biggest partnerships (that no one else remembers) as they both padded up to open the batting one last time. And well they did.

We surpassed Flimwell’s 10-over score in just six balls with the help of J Flem’s bat and the umpire’s outstretched arms, and we never looked back from there. Both Flems biffed and swished their way to a mostly serene 50 partnership in just 10 overs, guiding and driving their way through the Flimwell bowling attack. 79 was the final partnership as J Flem ambivalently poked at a ball he should have hit for six.

Now joined by Tristan, M Flem continued to patiently nurdle the life from Flimwell. Both prodded another 10 patient runs each before Tristan was correctly adjudged LBW for Umpire Omar’s only dismissal of the match. Ejas didn’t trouble the scorer and couldn’t match his previous Flimwell fireworks, but the one-legged Fowler could. He biffed a four and a six down the ground to finish the match, finishing 16* and M Flem 42*.

We got there with about 10 overs left in the end, quite congenial. 20 points for the 2s and only a few elsewhere means we’re officially safe from relegation. The packed league table also means we’re just 11 points from 4th place which would mean a VERY good season indeed. Promotion is still technically possible, but next year perhaps a more reasonable expectation!

Scorecard: https://speldhurst.play-cricket.com/website/division/109025

26th August v Stonehouse (H)

It was quite a Saturday at the Rec. With survival assured for the season, attention turned to securing an excellent 5th position – our best since 2019.

The usual opening bowling partnership of Omar and Amir rumbled into action for the umpteenth time this season, once again performing with maturity and assurance. This week it was Omar’s turn to take a dive into the wickets pile: first with a very neat nick behind, second with a Dixie Jagger, and the third bowled around his legs! Swinging, it was. Amir picked up one for himself, and both bowled excellently to whichever weird field settings their captain threw at them.

A couple of good overs from Birthday Boy Freddie went by without too much alarm, before M Flem arrived for his final spell in Speldhurst whites. First ball? Wicket. Inevitable. Despite bowling as balefully as ever, that was his sole wicket on his final outing, but perhaps should have been more if the cricketing gods smiled more.

As Mark was taking his Speldhurst bow at the Pavilion end, Ben Roberts was making his Speldhurst return at the other. Showing fantastic progress over the last few years, Ben bowled with control and menace and was unlucky not to take a wicket in five tight overs. Calypso, back from a continental sojourn, had no such trouble and defied a dodgy elbow to take another two wickets for his seasonal tally (and fantasy league pile).

A brief rain shower meant a slightly early tea followed by an awkward couple of overs for the young death bowlers, but with those behind us we began our pursuit of 194 (which was perhaps a few more than we should have allowed them to get) with high hopes.

A new opening partnership of Freddie and Iqbal brought Iqbal’s first runs of the season, and saw Freddie land the first real blow of our innings. Only 21 from his willow, but scored in a way that gave us immediate momentum. He also lost the new ball into the gardens which was useful for a while. We did get it back in the end: Judy kindly fetched a fishing net last wielded by a young Price around some rockpools, and Hannah (very amusingly) went fishing in the rose bushes of Furzefield Avenue. Another outstanding piece of Flemington dedication!

Iqbal and Freddie fell in quick succession, bringing M Flem and Calypso to the crease. Both have been ever dependable over the 2023 season, amassing north of 200 runs each and key contributors to our successes. Chris wasn’t able to capitalise on the day however, and was bowled by one keeping a smidge low. Yours truly and Mark then flayed a few to the boundary and ran studiously before the latter finally fell. Mark departed for 23, walking off in the sunshine to warm applause from the growing audience, teammates and opposition alike.

Meanwhile, back in the middle, I was enjoying some generous bowling from the Stonehouse attack and had walloped my way to 50ish in the marvellous company of Messrs Roberts, Price and Eames. However, all fell. Ben used Muddy’s Net as intended, dispatching a VERY flat six into it before being caught trying to hit another a similar distance. Tristan was well caught low in the covers, and Paul scampered a few handy runs. Unfortunately, Paul eventually had to retire injured. His hamstring succumbed to a quick run and took his shoulder with it. We wish him all the best in recovery, and a thank you to Ben Roberts who returned to the field in a professional capacity as physio, and Mark who was on driving duty.

All felt a little frazzled after the delay, but we eventually got back underway with the evening sun at Greensand levels of blindingness. Omar accompanied me congenially for a few overs as I continued to give the opposition PLENTY of chances to get me out. Luckily, they simply refused to take any of them and I eventually had to use all my many large muscles to bring up a century with a six. Amir biffed the next ball for four over the bowler’s head and that was that. 20 points after a nerveless (that’s a lie) chase.

I hope you indulge me just a moment longer, but a thank you from me. Mark has been a fantastic servant of Speldhurst Cricket Club for 16 years, and has played a huge part in many cricketing developments as U15 coach (mine actually!), Sunday captain and the 2s top wicket-taker AND run-scorer. Saturday was his final game for the club, for which he has taken more than 200 wickets and scored over 3000 runs. A club icon. As Mark has mentioned elsewhere – thank you to Min, Hannah, Helen, Judy, Lizzie and Alison for a spectacular spread of cakes, tea and celebratory bubbly. Mark – we look forward to seeing you at the club any time for a cup of tea, a jug of Larkins, and/or an emergency ten overs of umpiring when we’re inevitably short of competence.

Scorecard: https://speldhurst.play-cricket.com/website/results/5548013

2nd September v Eynsford (A)

The final league game of the season. We still had a SLIM chance of promotion, but that required a win as well as Groombridge to whoop Weald, and Stonehouse to whoop Farningham. Eynsford also had a slim chance of winning the league and had a very strong side out.

Amir and Omar opened (I think we might be saying that a lot in the years to come) with varying degrees of success. Eynsford has a significant hillock just before one hits the crease, and it’s difficult to deal with. Unfortunately, Omar couldn’t find his length quickly enough, and had to be yanked from the attack before causing any damage to the wickets column.

Amir picked up wickets (three, to move him second in the 2s bowling rankings) when bowling in tandem with big brother Ejas, who didn’t pick up any scalps but bowled with venom that troubled every new Eynsford batsman Amir threw at him.

Siraj took over and bowled excellently, as usual, and picked up four wickets. His captain denied him his shot of a 5fer with sheer ineptitude. New boy Karim extracted as much spin and bounce from a pitch as we’ve seen all season, and took an EXCELLENT caught and bowled well above his head. Plunkett cleaned up the final two wickets, and we’d bowled them out for 129. We didn’t even need Nash or Calypso…

A quick word on the fielding. This was by far the best fielding performance I’ve ever seen by an SCC outfit. Two diving catches from Will, two running grabs from Omar, and two perfectly judged snaffles from Magneto (Siraj) who was trying hopelessly to avoid the ball re-splitting his webbing. The ground fielding was also exemplary. Some display!

Now batting. Looking at the XI, bowling and fielding was always going to be our strong suit, and with a tricky pitch (after the customary Friday deluge) we struggled from the off. Will skied the second ball of the innings to point, and then Adam plinked his second to mid wicket. Both outdone by the sluggish bowler and pitch.

Their military medium opener did for our top five batsmen in fact, and we were 27-5 at one point. Some resilience from Omar (who impressed with the bat for the second week in a row), Siraj and myself got us to a respectable 80ish, but the chase was never really on the cards against a very good bowling attack.

So, final league position: 5th. We celebrated well into the evening at the Blue India (with the world’s most expensive curry) and can all be proud of a cracking season. Going into the final weekend with a sniff of promotion signals an excellent campaign indeed. I won’t go into final stats or stuff now; they’re all on PlayCricket anyway, I’ll leave all that until the awards evening in November!

Scorecard: https://speldhurst.play-cricket.com/website/results/5548022